Many of our children are empathic (so are many adults, maybe even you!)
Empathic means “to take on the feelings of others.” Many sensitive, empathic kids tend to do this wherever they go, especially in school. In the desire to heal another, whether it is conscious or not (often not), they will often take on the feelings of those around them, and this can be hazardous to their own health.
To recognize and deal with their own feelings is crucial for their soul’s growth, but when other’s feelings are mistaken for their own, life can get very confusing and frustrating.
One way to safeguard against taking on anothers feelings is to put up an “Empathy Bubble”. It’s very simple. All one has to do is imagine a clear bubble, like a very large soap bubble, surrounding the entire body.
The best way I have found to do this is to sit quietly for a moment, close my eyes, and just imagine myself being completely surrounded from head to toe with a beautiful, shimmering, bubble that feels warm and safe inside. I do this whenever I am planning on going into an environment with other people, like a classroom or shopping mall. Since it only takes a few seconds, I can do it in the car before entering the occupied space.
Once the bubble is in place, it’s safe to walk in the occupied space knowing the feelings of others will not be able to penetrate this shield.
It’s easy and fun to teach to your kids. It will help them be sure that what they are experiencing are actually their own feelings, and not those of others. When they recognize what their own feelings really are, they’ll be able to deal with them much easier. This is particularly important for the more sensitive ones, especially when they are in their classrooms.
So instead of reminding them to “keep your hands to yourself” you can say “keep your feelings to yourself!”
Reminder: COT gathering tomorrow night at 6:30 with special guest Margy Henderson!
(Scroll down for further details on the COT Monthly Support Gatherings!)
January 15, 2007 at 12:43 pm
I’m glad to have come across your site and will be checking in. We have a son, Matthew, who has autism. He will be 12 yars old on Feb 4. As you can imagine, any information that we can acquire is greatly appreciated. He does communicate some verbally, but not a whole lot. He seems to understand what is said to him for the most part.
January 15, 2007 at 1:38 pm
Dear Timbob,
You are a very lucky man to have such an amazing child in your care!
I truly believe the Children of Today labeled “autistic” (you might want to read my thoughts on labeling…also some call them “awesomistic”) are here for a major purpose, and part, if not all, of that purpose is to raise up the rest of us to embrace a new way to communicate.
I am currently working on “COT Cards”, a communication tool for those who can’t use words to express their feelings.
(I will keep you and the site posted on their progress.)
I believe it’s time to honor these children and the way they have come into this world to help heal on a global level.
It’s not easy for them either and I think the best things we can do to support them is to love them and try to understand them from their point of view.
Sit quietly with your son, open your heart and just listen…amazing things may develop.